Dear Mike Cares, what advice would you give Mrs. Kinda Very Attractive"

DEAR MIKE CARES: I've been with my husband for 19 years, and we have established a loving, stable relationship despite some very tumultuous times. I have always known he finds me attractive, and he compliments my appearance, but many times throughout our marriage, his demeanor toward me has changed if someone more attractive is around. (He repeatedly checks out women while we are on a date, or even pretends not to know me when they walk by.) He has never been unfaithful or anything like that. He recently told me I'm "very attractive" but not beautiful, and that the women he has disrespected me over in the past were more attractive than I am. His comparisons of me vs. them are uncalled-for and embarrassing and have made me question my appearance. I'm not bothered if he finds people attractive, but to treat me poorly because of it and make distinctions between my looks and theirs makes me feel inadequate and judged. Are my feelings normal? Isn't it understandable to feel put off, or am I nitpicking, immature and expecting too much? -- ATTRACTIVE, NOT BEAUTIFUL

DEAR ATTRACTIVE, NOT BEAUTIFUL: So, you’ve been married for 19 years and you still haven’t figured out that men are simple-minded animals who genuinely limit their thoughts to sex, food and sports?  Sure, he’s a fucktard for humiliating you whenever a younger, sexier and newer model crosses the path of his drunken gaze, but I think we both know that he probably couldn’t land a “beautiful” woman without a new Ferrari, a hairpiece and losing 35 pounds. Hey, you heard the man, you are attractive, so don’t sell yourself short, and remember no matter how many hot chicks your husband sees and verbally yearns for, just like for the past 19 years, it is you he will always come slithering back to for your tasteless meatloaf, mediocre blow jobs and your inability to stand up for yourself. Good Luck and Keep in Touch! Dear Mike Cares is also on X, Instagram and Facebook (whatever they are.) For more honest advice, email me your stupid questions at DearMikeCares@gmail.com